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2020 THE NOT-SO-LOST YEAR

I think of 2020 as a missing year, a lost year. My friends and I often joke that 2020 just doesn't count. I have internalized that message so much that even my math is affected; between January 2016 and January 2021 there are only four years. But if I am honest with myself 2020 was not lost, it freed me and the people I work for from unnecessary restraints, it gave me the space to prioritize and make a habit of prioritizing my health, and the time to really think about what I actually do and don't need to be happy. 

I. HOBBIES:

A. I started 2020 with the goal of picking up pottery. I took courses at my alma matter which was probably the best decision ever, not only did I learn something new, but being so far removed from home meant that there was zero chance of running into work. It was also nice to connect with people on a level other than what I could do for them. Unfortunately, classes had to end, but to be bad at
something and for that to be normal and expected was incredibly liberating. 
 


B. Once the pandemic kicked-in full force, I started to go through all of my lipsticks. I would wear one each day in the hopes that the pandemic would end before my lipstick supply did. As it turned out the pandemic outlasted the lipstick supply, but the lipstick supply was huge-I had over 300 lipsticks which led me to explore why I had so many. I realized that over the years I had taken on so many volunteer opportunities and so many tasks, that my ability to paint and play with colors was  very restricted, by  buying lipstick and playing with them for seconds at a time each day I found a way to enable a lifestyle that didn't give me much time to have hobbies. I started to have hobbies again.
    


II. HEALTH:

 A. With the removal of travel time and time to get dressed for a particular job each day, I suddenly had time for daily walks, and since the walks didn't have to be rushed, I could stop to appreciate changes in  nature on a minute and daily basis. My daily walks also gave structure to my day, a structure that was set by the needs of my body and mind and not the needs of someone who was paying me for my time. 

B. With many restaurants shut down initially, I was forced to cook a lot of my meals. That made me realize that what I thought I had been paying for all these years (convenience) wasn't really convenient. I only realized that when places started to open up and I could see that it took me a lot more time to drive for my meals than it did to prepare them. I also realized that once separated from the eating establishments, meals didn't really taste that great and what I was really enjoying was ambiance and company, not the meal. That has led me to eat more home cooked meals which help me better manage my actual intake of fats, sugars, proteins and carbs.  

III. WORK
A. Some of the best changes happened as a result of changes in the work environment. No longer did I have to waste a lot of time proving to people that I did what I said I was going to do, everyone was so overwhelmed, that few people had time to micro-manage. I finally hit my happy place where the only instruction was to get things done by a certain date and I was good. Even the feds stopped asking to take fingerprints over and over and over.  

B. I also saved over 12 hours a week in commuting time. That time was spent finally painting my house, exercising, cooking, taking care of myself and even breastfeeding without my employer or  business partners having a say in my breastfeeding schedule as they would have otherwise. 

III. FINANCES
A. Without the need of spending as much on professional women's clothes and without the need to order out for every lunch-work meeting. I actually saved a lot more than I lost in income, helping me save for home repairs-now getting craftspeople to actually show up to work in Central, PA, that's a challenge even a pandemic can't fix. 

B. I learned to monetize my online presence. Yes, if you were to click on the Real Her hyperlink and    make a purchase, I would receive a commission. I haven't use this skill yet, but learning the many ways one can monetize their online presence might be valuable later on. (BTW-I also discovered Real Her during the pandemic, their colors and quality are awesome, but the packaging isn't my favorite)

IV. FAMILY AND FRIENDS
 A. With everyone being forced by their employers to video-conference, I was able to spend a lot  more time with friends and family virtually, and with everyone spending less time commuting, we had more time to call each other, virtually eat meals together. Video conferencing was no longer annoying to them. 

B. Shifting over to a virtual work environment meant that I was able to become pregnant and manage my pregnancy without the interference of employers, clients or contractors. I could not have been able to be pregnant in the "normal" work context where things like exercise, eating healthy, flexibility are necessary for a healthy pregnancy and baby, but can become a challenge in the workplace where employers need to micromanage their staff. 

So while I refer to 2020 as a lost year, I am not sure that is the right word. It is a year I had to do without the things I tend to lean on, and in some ways, it made me realize that I had grown too comfortable with the toxic elements in my life; as much as I hated them, they were there because I didn't know what life looked like without them and now that I know, I doubt my life will ever be the same again. 

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